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My Skin Colour Hasn’t Changed, But The Way I View Myself Certainly Has

no picture Prakriti Pokhrel
Member since August 31, 2018
  • 1 Post

Photo by Jenna Hamra from Pexels

Photo by Jenna Hamra from Pexels

Isn’t it weird that during childhood, someone’s view affected our thinking on social ethics, religion, someone’s life or a particular thing? Yes, the same thing happened to me when I was a 13-year-old teenage girl. I was a tall girl and had a dark complexion. One knows how people see dark complexioned people in this country. People see dark complexioned people as sinful.

It is the 21st century. Yet, people’s thinking is not different from someone in the 19th century. Being from a middle-class family, during gatherings with relatives, I was at the center of attention. Relatives used to say that she is so tall and dark at this age, just imagine how she will look when she is 24. They would say, "if her face is like this, her character will also be similar" and laugh.

It would make me feel so uncomfortable. Why does skin color matter so much, even today? During our teenage years, friends and parents are meant to be with us during the period when we are changing from teenagers to adults. Our physical appearance undergoes change, the mind becomes more mature and we need someone to counsel us. Yet, I wasn’t lucky enough to get emotional and mental support from them. I used to get bullied at school, and my parents were kind of sad to have a daughter who was dark, as I was their only child. Sometimes, I felt like a sinner in my family and society just because of my skin color. I was devastated, and it used to make me hate myself. I didn’t roam with my friends as I was so afraid of the negative comments they were going to hurl at me. I became an introvert.

Later, I watched videos on Youtube, read articles and came to know it was not only me who was suffering from mental trauma because of my skin complexion. There are thousands of people who have to suffer from mental harassment for the same reason.

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