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It’s the end of a chapter, not of the book


Avatar Hannah
Member since June 8, 2015
  • 37 Posts
  • Age 19

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I’m bad at goodbyes so I’m not going to make this one. It is the end of a chapter in my life but when I turn the page, there will be more. I’m sure writing will be mentioned on those new pages too. I’ve been thinking about everything this internship taught me too. The thing is, it taught me so many things that I didn’t even know where to start. However, one thing kept going through my head. ‘It changed the way I see the world’. In which way? It made me realize three important things:

1. Not enough does not mean not good enough

I’ve always felt as if I’m not doing enough. There is so much misery in this world and all I do is lay on my bed and write something once in a while. If my posts had been better then maybe I could really make a change with just my words, but they weren’t. I’ve always felt like I need to do something extraordinary to make an impact. Although I still feel like I need to do more, I realize now that it is okay that my writing is not perfect and even more important, that I do much more then I think I’m doing.

My biggest problem is the fear of not being good enough. This internship made me realize how much that fear is blocking me and it helped me to free myself from that fear. I’m not free yet but I’ll work on it until I am. I’m working on myself. I’m improving. I’ll never be perfect and I’ll never make this world a perfect place but that’s okay. We need you to fight injustice, we need you to change this world for the better but we also need you to know you are already doing a wonderful job. We need you to do more and to work on yourself but the fact that we all need to do more does not mean that what we are doing now is not good enough. It simply means that we cannot stand still.

2. A world we don’t know

I always agreed with the saying ‘the world is my backyard’. I go to an Asian supermarket because I love Asian food, I listen to music from all over the world, most of my clothes have been in various continents before they ended up in my closet and so on. Guess what; the world isn’t that small after all. The borders of my country may not be the problem but the selection of information and knowledge is. (I thank Maria for writing the post ‘Why Am I Doing Exactly What I Preach Against?’. That post was a real eye opener.)

There are dishes that I’ll never eat, music that I’ll never listen to, people I’ll never meet. There are countries I’ll never go, stories I’ll never hear. Yet they would all have been worth my time. The stories Enana told about Assyrians, it made me realize there is so much I don’t know and so much I will never know. Or when Harsh made that analyse the tv-show Avatar: the last Airbender; it was my favourite show as a little kid but I had not once looked at the show from the perspective he described. I will only know my world, my people, and my stories. That is also why meeting new people is so beautiful. Through their stories you discover another part of the world.

3. The truth?

Is there such a thing as ‘what is right’ or ‘the ultimate truth’? Those are some questions I like to think about. My internship has changed my answer to those questions because of realization number two. I do believe there is such a thing as ‘the truth’ but not one person in this world is able to know it. As I just said, we only know about such a small part of all this world has to offer. You have to be in every place, at every time and look from every angle in order to know ‘the truth’. Since that is not possible, there is only yours and there is mine. However, if you tell your truth and I tell mine, then together those will be a bit closer to ‘the truth’ because together we experienced more.

More people means more experiences and that means ‘more truth’. What am I trying to say with this? Don’t change your beliefs, your experiences convinced you that they are true so to you they are. And if they are true to you, then we need you to voice them and defend them. At the same time, let new experiences shape your beliefs. Don’t hold on to things that aren’t true for you anymore. And last, don’t blame people for believing a certain thing. They have every right to believe their truths. What you can – and should – do is offering them new experiences. Let them see parts of the world they have never seen. Make them understand why you look at the world the way you do.

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